Bottom Locker Blag!

Question 4. You are reading a book in the loo, on the toilet. It isn't a classic, or a particularly popular book, but you enjoy reading it. You are done pooping and really have to get going, except there is no toilet paper left. You have the option of tearing out the next page of the book, which you haven't yet read, and using it as toilet paper. You are not allowed to read the next page before you use it, nor are you ever allowed to read it in the future if you take this option. If you want to read the next page, you have to go about for the rest of the day without ever having used toilet paper. Nobody will know, but you will be mildly uncomfortable and very paranoid for the rest of the day. Do you wipe?

Question 10. Scientists and behavioral psychologists have come up with a way to make a monkey butler. You have the option of getting a monkey that will do everything that you never want to do. It will clean, buy groceries, drive you around and throw poo at people you don't like amongst other things. The monkey never dies, so you will never have to lift a finger again. Unfortunately, a side effect of having the monkey is that you will forever begin conversations with very uncomfortable and nonsensical questions. "How were your bowel movements today, Boss?" "This is our first date, do you mind if I bite your ear off?" Do you take the monkey?

Question 23. An ailment has been inflicted across America, and you have to choose one of the following options. Option 1: You sing "Come on Eileen" in its entirety everytime you orgasm. Option 2: You orgasm every time you hear the word "Waffles." Which ailment do you choose?

I am taking answers now, in the comments and at bottom.danger.locker@gmail.com

Hearts,

Vanish